cohero | (Reply)

From:

( for a moment, something within bruce twists up when dick goes and says that about alfred. no, he doesn't need to check in with him. but alfred is all he has. has had over the years. he'd almost lost him once. the way he'd flippantly told the man he wasn't his father when he had, for all intents and purposes been just that to and for him over the years. the way his eyes narrow some show that maybe dick shouldn't press on that issue too much, but. ultimately, he lets that go.

instead, his gaze drops. his thoughts spin. he takes in what dick is saying while simultaneously replaying everything over in his head. when it comes to work — to figuring things out that involve crimes and criminals, he almost always hits the nail on the head. when it comes to himself and whatever emotions he may or may not be letting himself feel... not always so good with that. largely due to his clunky way of handling them. mostly out of a deep-seated fear he can't ever shake.

but this is what he warned dick about. how he deserved someone better— how he was liable to hurt him without even realizing it. yet it's also why some part of him had told him to not let go even when bruce wanted him to. to push him— push at those walls when they started to go back up. because they always do, even with alfred sometimes and no, it's not fair that they need to push at him. it never is. but he needs it done sometimes. when he starts to sink back into his own personal shadows.

licking over his lips, he glances away. takes a moment to swallow. then looks back to dick there in front of him. )

That's— I didn't mean it like that.

( he's not sure what he's saying, so he ducks his head for a moment. furrows his brow. )

It's just routine.

( because this man has rarely broken his usual routine for a long time now. )