[It's all a learning curve in Dick's book. One he'll do his best to catch onto as quickly as possible to drag them through the least amount of mud, gore and unpleasant pain as possible, because he has this tiny notion that as much as Jay like might picking at scabs and flicking them across the room, not caring what they become. The bigger wounds are not so fun to dig at. They're the ones that get tossed around with temper and then apologized over, possibly. Dick still isn't quite sure. He's still climbing this hill with his training wheels on, as much as he always hated them.
There were comparisons, but they were quickly falling away left and right, bleeding away as one does toxins from a wound. Not that either of them were toxic, just that they weren't native to the system and while there were minor similarities, the major characteristics attached didn't gather themselves up the same way. Maybe that should have pushed Dick away, made him reconsider. It should have made his desire less. He'd never found men particularly attractive. Maybe one or two, but the deep gravel of Jay's voice and the smart attitude, the way he watched his brain work during training and while they were at the bar had him hard thinking of it.
It quickly drew Dick in, and held him there. Maybe his heart was too lost in the other Jason to know how to change certain affections and that should have already happened, Dick himself didn't understand why it didn't. He knew within one set conflict that one Red Hood was not like the rest. He inhaled deeply now as he stood here and watched this one pull his shirt off. Dick ran his fingers along Jay's body, tracing scars that he thought were nothing but beautiful, history, and while he knew they represented pain, and sometimes things barely remembered, they were all a part of the man in front of him.
When he reached the scar on his neck, he bit his lip. Dick's whole being ached to kiss over it, to taste the scar tissue. To take down the person who had done that to Jay. He figured it had been one of his killing wounds, but that didn't fit either story. His brow furrowed. Letting Jay touch him, Dick reached down and pulled his own shirt off. He had his own tale of scars, a few stray bullets, plenty of pointy things that got through and a nasty mark on his shoulder, straight through, then there was his own mark on his neck. A garish scar that look like his neck has been blasted open and only scar tissue remained. Mostly the truth.
Moving back in, Dick pressed their bodies together, and kissed Jay's shoulder from blade to neck, soft not harsh. and looked back. ]
It's not a type of different I suspect you or I really can create together I've realized. I want a relationship, but you're not in any place to want one if I read you right, and I don't know you. I don't know but a few things about you. That doesn't mean I don't want this. I still want it. I haven't changed my mind. It took me a while to figure it out, but I'm not running. I'm here to pay attention to what you have to show me. I'm not going to be really great at it, but I'm learning.
no subject
There were comparisons, but they were quickly falling away left and right, bleeding away as one does toxins from a wound. Not that either of them were toxic, just that they weren't native to the system and while there were minor similarities, the major characteristics attached didn't gather themselves up the same way. Maybe that should have pushed Dick away, made him reconsider. It should have made his desire less. He'd never found men particularly attractive. Maybe one or two, but the deep gravel of Jay's voice and the smart attitude, the way he watched his brain work during training and while they were at the bar had him hard thinking of it.
It quickly drew Dick in, and held him there. Maybe his heart was too lost in the other Jason to know how to change certain affections and that should have already happened, Dick himself didn't understand why it didn't. He knew within one set conflict that one Red Hood was not like the rest. He inhaled deeply now as he stood here and watched this one pull his shirt off. Dick ran his fingers along Jay's body, tracing scars that he thought were nothing but beautiful, history, and while he knew they represented pain, and sometimes things barely remembered, they were all a part of the man in front of him.
When he reached the scar on his neck, he bit his lip. Dick's whole being ached to kiss over it, to taste the scar tissue. To take down the person who had done that to Jay. He figured it had been one of his killing wounds, but that didn't fit either story. His brow furrowed. Letting Jay touch him, Dick reached down and pulled his own shirt off. He had his own tale of scars, a few stray bullets, plenty of pointy things that got through and a nasty mark on his shoulder, straight through, then there was his own mark on his neck. A garish scar that look like his neck has been blasted open and only scar tissue remained. Mostly the truth.
Moving back in, Dick pressed their bodies together, and kissed Jay's shoulder from blade to neck, soft not harsh. and looked back. ]
It's not a type of different I suspect you or I really can create together I've realized. I want a relationship, but you're not in any place to want one if I read you right, and I don't know you. I don't know but a few things about you. That doesn't mean I don't want this. I still want it. I haven't changed my mind. It took me a while to figure it out, but I'm not running. I'm here to pay attention to what you have to show me. I'm not going to be really great at it, but I'm learning.