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[cohero]

[It takes a beat. two. three, and then Dick realizes what Bruce meant. Everything softens. The spark that had settled in his eyes turns into a different sort of look. The finger that had been tracing along Bruce's chest moves over to his heart, joined by the rest of Dick's hand and spreads out there.

There's a small twist to his lips that turn them into a soft smile. Dick's free hand reach up into dark, damp strands of hair and tuck them back as he leans in and rests their foreheads together. Pressing in even closer he lets the front of their bodies rest as one again.

Lips dust in bare observance of one another.]

You're not going to make me leave Bruce. I didn't leave before, and so much has happened. There's no way I'd leave now.

[Not even if this is self-sabotaged does Dick intend on leaving. He's not even sure he would intend on letting it go all that easily. He's pretty good at screwing things up in the most brilliant factor-- so maybe this one time he'll figure out how to combat someone like himself. Maybe. There are never, ever guarantees in life. So, it's still one day at a time.]

[batsymbol]

( if only he could believe that.

he knows he's difficult — knows he puts those who care about him through the ringer at times. alfred certainly has had more than his fair share of probably wanting to rip his hair out when dealing with him. yet he stays around. for some reason. love, he assumes. love for a boy he raised and sees as his own in ways.

being so close to dick as he currently is, blue eyes gently fall shut and he stands there with him. just breathing. just taking in this moment as he's been doing over the course of the night. taking in the smell and presence of the other man. )

I wouldn't blame you if you did though.

( and those words are so very soft as he says them. )

[cohero]

[Merely laying their faces together, Dick listens to the sounds around them. The hushed inhales and exhales of their breathing as it mingles between them, and the small ticking of a clock somewhere off in the distance. There's a hum from the fridge, and a creak every now and again as the apartment settles here and there.

Bruce isn't the only one who knows how to be difficult. Dick has been a stick in the mud for so many years, and had chased of all his girlfriends, and many, many friends. He's brought harm to people he's loved and worse. Maybe that's one of the reasons why he's not so afraid of all the things that he knows Bruce capable of.

The words are soft and yet still powerful. It twists Dick's heart to know how deeply Bruce feels -- how deeply he feels about how things might end up between them. Pulling back he slides a finger along Bruce's chin and looks at him softly. Eyes open or not.]

What if you don't. What if you're one of the reasons I want to stay the most. Don't chase a future you don't know yet.

[batsymbol]

( this feels vulnerable of him and yet, some part of him seems to lean into it. lean into dick in ways he hasn't really with another before. maybe it's due to the fact that dick understands this life — understands how difficult and how much sacrifice comes with this path. or maybe it's the fact that they both share a darkness within themselves that strike similar chords within one another. like attracts like, isn't it? but is it always for the better? he doesn't know and he's sure to overthink it at some point like always, but. for now...

...for now he noses at the man there so close to him. the man who slides a finger along his chin with brown eyes soft and warm on him that he can almost feel despite his own blue ones being closed. gently, lips chase after dick's and he steals a kiss from him. soft and slow. tender almost in ways that one might not think bruce is capable of being. he is. in his own ways. he just doesn't always show it so much. a vulnerability he can't always seem to afford.

but with that kiss comes a gentle touch to the nape of dick's neck, fingers pressing so soft to warm skin there and when that kiss comes to an end, he presses his forehead to his again. breath slow and steady, like his heartbeat seems to be right now. content. he doesn't even know how long it's been since he's felt that emotion. )

[cohero]

[Much of this feels like a play and replay of some of their earlier moments, the tiny gentle ones that they started the evening off with-- except these are tempered with an even greater amount of emotional entanglement than previously. Dick knows that they've wondered what it is that continues to bring them back to this, their bodies close, noses touching, lips sharing space and breath curling between them.

Their shared darkness, the evil that twists up their lives, the murders and mangled up childhoods they never quite had, all bring them into this place where Dick knows that he is drawn to Bruce in a way that he is drawn to no other man. He's given a part of himself over to this man that no one else will ever have, and there is not an ounce of regret. There will be moments to ponder-- but regret is not something that Dick has a feeling will come, not for the action.

When they kiss this last time, Dick can sense the soft tick of their hearts and the whole of ease that is brought into this singular moment. There's so much contentment that Dick barely breathes out of want to hold it. He runs his fingers softly over the swell of a prominent cheekbone, and back into bits of drying hair. With a smile his eyes greet the ones that stay across from his. Emotion wells up, and Dick holds steady, reveling in the simple fact that it exists.]

[batsymbol]

( the vulnerability— the softness of this moment has bruce gently duck his head. this version of him is so much more fragile than the dark knight of gotham who hides within the shadows of the streets at night. skin, pale and littered with scars and bruises that batman earns. then there's his heart that wears unhealed wounds across it that cut so incredibly deep, he doesn't even know if they'll ever fully heal. the loss of his parents and the guilt he carries with him for not finding their killer(s)... it gives him purpose, despite the pain, but it comes with such a cost and so many sacrifices at the same time.

he feels more comfortable — less vulnerable when he sits there in his darkness than he does in moments like these that often leave people feeling warm and safe. but that's not to say he's not trying. he's right here. to be happy... he doesn't know if he'll ever reach that. but... maybe he can try. slowly. very, very slowly.

at least he has this. at least he has... at least dick is here.

a lift of his head, he just barely noses at dick again. blue eyes searching his face in a way that's more soft than scrutinizing. )

You planning on watching the sunrise or want to go back to bed?

( that's where they'd been before the whole we should probably move the food suggestion happened. )

[cohero]

[It doesn't matter how slow they have to go. Dick will move at the speed of a glacier if that's what it takes for Bruce, and he knows that it'll be one step forward and half a million back. That's how this dance works, and how it was always going to work if they truly crossed the threshold of it. All it meant was that the word try had moved into their vocabulary. Not that there were any expectations on it. It merely existed on its own, as simple as a word could, wrapped in the warmth of a moment created here in the dim light of Dick's kitchen as they both shared the heat of their bodies and the brush of their faces, in tiny intimate gestures.

Dick was becoming more and more used to the tiny little sacrifices of nose and cheek that Bruce gave every time he would feel anything. It was a language all of its own, Dick believed. He'd done it enough throughout the night and now into the early morning, that it begun to make him hold his breath in anticipation, waiting for the tiny touch of lips that usually followed.

Watching those eyes, Dick softens his and lets them speak gentle emotions, care, safety, comfort. Nothing overtly dangerous all on their own, but mildly cautious and there to wrap around Bruce exactly like Dick's arms do. ]

Which would you rather. The glow is just beginning. We can go to the window, or even to the balcony to watch the colors before the sun actually rises.

[Moving around the counter, Dick moves toward the door in the living room. There's no one to see him this chill morning hour. He grabs an extra blanket from the couch and holds out a hand to Bruce. ]

Come to me?

[batsymbol]

( there's a softness with his movements — with his very expression when dick goes and says what he does. but it's the come to me part that has those blue eyes of his really looking to the other man there with that blanket. with his hand held out for him. it's enough to have a huff leave him, though it's more in gentle amusement than anything else. a sort of is this really happening? in his head. because... since when does anything as soft and gentle and intimate like this ever happen with him lately? )

I get the feeling you might like when I come.

( a bit of innuendo there, because why not.

but he takes the other's hand and lets himself be dragged to wherever dick wants to take him. he won't resist or be picky about it. he'll just follow. this time. for now. )

[cohero]

[The huff has grown to fondness status that equals a touch of a nose, or the way Bruce flicks his hair back from time to time when they are so close it falls against both their cheeks. It's almost a term of endearment in Bruce's world as far as Dick is concerned. There's the same simple amusement in Dick's eyes, settled there, patient, waiting.

A larger laugh meets the question, and Dick can't help but smirk. ]

Well, I do like that. You are a beast. That's not what I was looking for here. Get your gorgeous bruised up ass over here, Bruce.

[Taking the other's hand in his, Dick pulls open the door with a short blast of cold air that tempers when the door is closed behind them. He quickly wraps them up both with the blanket and moves to nuzzle them down in a small single person hammock he has on the balcony.

With Bruce in front of him, Dick is able to wrap arms about the the other male, and rest his chin on Bruce's shoulder, wrapping them together tightly while they gaze toward the pale glow of reds, pinks and oranges that begin to peek over the horizon, pushing back at the shadows they both know so well.]

All long nights eventually come to an end, or so they say.

[batsymbol]

( it's nice. almost a little too nice to be settled out here on the balcony in a hammock. dick behind him, arms there along with the blanket. the thought occurs to him that this isn't just a sort of once in a blue moon moment for him, but. more than likely, also for dick, what with their similar lifestyles and habits.

his gaze turns towards the sky — to the way the other man goes about describing the night and he sighs as blue eyes fall shut, breeze gentle in the way it brushes by. )

I'm not so sure when it comes to people like us.

( words soft as he lets them fall from his lips. because it feels as if the nights they endure never quite seem to end. even when the sun is risen and the sky blue with light and warmth. somehow, it still feels as if he's still wading through the night. as if it's simply become a part of him. )

[cohero]

[It's true, this probably the second or third time Dick's ever used this balcony at all. The chair squeaks terribly, because it's been out in weather and never oiled properly. It's clean, because he has people do that-- but it's unused. So this has been a small dream, and ideal never followed through on.

Watching the colors as they continue to streak across the sky, Dick enjoys the purple that comes into being along with the deep amber, and other hues he has no name for. His fingers stroke along Bruce's leg, and up to his waist to cling, making sure all the heat stays trapped within the circle of the blanket as they barely move ]

I never said ours did. That's why I added the caveat. I don't know where nights end, and days occasionally begin, if they do. Here, gaze for a second more before the sun begins to crest and we should go inside. We don't need the bright light of dawn.

[Kissing the back of Bruce's ear, all of Dick's words are softly spoken, a dream within the small tiny world they've created right here in this little space of moments.]

[batsymbol]

( slowly, eyes flutter open and he lets himself look to the sky as per dick's suggestion. he's seen it numerous times. usually when heading back home after a long night on the streets of gotham. but it's not his to enjoy. not to be taken as the beginning for him as it is for so many others. for him, it's the end of another day. another night. because night is his beginning every time it falls.

the kiss, the softness, the way dick is so close to him there... bruce glances down then — glances to the arms around him beneath the blanket enveloping them. dick deserves better than this, he thinks. better than this life he's now stuck living. better than the sacrifices he's no doubt made at the cost of his own well-being and happiness more often than not. better than him, right here. someone who, he may have thought saved him at one point, but. wonders now, if he might have simply just damned him instead. damned him to live the very same life he's living.

sigh leaving him, he shifts then, letting himself pull away from the warmth of dick's embrace and the blanket. standing, he looks back to him, blue eyes soft. )

We should head inside.

[cohero]

[There's a moment, and then it's come and gone as the night has. It melts away with the day. Dick doesn't know what exactly caused it, but he knows it's there in the pull and tug out of his arms. They release, but it hurts a small part of him. It had been so warm, and the soft circle is broken. The huff becomes a sigh.

Dark eyes still meet the soft blue ones and he closes his eyes as the sun begins to crest, pushing himself out of the swing that pushes back and smacks him in the behind. Laughing, he turns and holds it still before taking them both inside. The spell is broken, but it was a lovely one indeed. The day isn't done, and neither is the night they have before them.

Eventually they will probably nap, not that Dick has to, but it might feel good. Padding back to his bedroom, where now there are no more cartons in the way, Dick stopped by the kitchen to pick up some coffee he brewed before they went out. ]

Shall I set this over on this side?

[Dick motions to the side that he doesn't have his supplies on, and crawls into the bed completely. ]

[batsymbol]

Sure.

( this is when bruce usually crawls into bed anyways. when he drops his head to the pillow and tries to find some semblance of peace within his slumber. it doesn't always come— rarely, really. nightmares are more prone to greet him when his eyes finally fall shut, but. not always. sometimes there's just nothing but black and he doesn't dream at all. he prefers it that way, really. even if it all feels over within the blink of an eye.

he makes his way to the bed — removes the robe he'd been given. naked. pale. scarred. both physically and emotionally as dick himself is. dropping down on the bed, he sighs. lets his fingers gently brush over the clean sheets beneath him. they're not his own, yet somehow they remind him of his. after a moment, he falls back. lays there on the bed and cards a set of fingers through his hair that's now just a little damp. he's tired. of a lot of things. but he tries to not let them weigh him down. not right now, right here, at least.

if he can find just a moment of peace, he'll take it. for as short-lived as it may be. )

[cohero]

[Coming back to lay in his bed is so very different from the way they left it, and the reasons. Before, it had been because they were making room to lay out because Dick had wanted more room to make out with Bruce-- who had been more than agreeable at the time. Their hands had been shifting along the insides of their robes and moving with a determined intent, that had still been soft and gentle all the same. No making messes, that's all it had been, but the moment was spoiled.

It seemed like in the span of fifteen, twenty minutes it all had changed. True, Dick now had Bruce laying naked in his bed, but he was on his back and quiet. There were no more huffs, or little brushes to his nose as they moved back into the room. Neither met at the doorway to catch a kiss or something else.

Removing his robe, Dick lets it fall to the ground and slides over to Bruce. He moves an arm across the other male's midsection and lightly kisses his chest. ]

Tired now? I can leave you be.

[batsymbol]

( slowly, an arm raises and fingers blindly find their way carding themselves through dick's hair. gentle and lazy. eyes half-lidded staring across the room as he lays there with him. )

Thought you wanted to stay.

( the words are a low murmur — a slow tilt of his head to better look to the other man there against him. watching the way strands of hair gently sift through his fingers. a shift forward, he noses at dick then. best he can, given their current position, but. an attempt made all the same. )

You should stay.

[cohero]

[The words surprise him for a second, but he smiles and shakes his head. That hadn't been what he meant, but it feels good that Bruce wants him there. It feels nice to be touched again. Moving in closer, Dick closes his eyes at the touch to his hair and leans in deeper still so he can let their noses brush.

Carefully, Dick grazes his lips across Bruce's, leaving them close.]

I wasn't going to leave the bedroom. I was merely going to let you be, and lay over on my side if you were tired of me and needed time to not be touched. I know that you aren't used to it, but I think you also need it. I'm not sure. I know that I enjoy it. A nap is fine if you need one.

[Lowering his head, Dick kisses along Bruce's jaw and then back up, counting ribs with his fingertips, not too soft-- not to tickle, but gentle enough to be tender, caress. ]

[batsymbol]

( the touches don't seem to burn this time. rather, they almost lull him into a state of contentment. something he hasn't really felt for some time now. yet here dick is, giving that to him and, like he says, maybe he needs it. or some part of him, at least.

pressing his head back into the pillow, he sighs, eyes falling shut while fingers continue to gently card through those dark coloured strands of dick's. quiet. lazy. just laying there with him like this. those kisses pressed along his jaw draws a low hum deep from the back of bruce's throat. )

Probably should. Least for a couple hours.

( he can manage on a few hours of sleep. has more or less trained himself to. )

You should, too.

[cohero]

[Feeling the laziness, Dick lets himself be lulled into the moment. He turns his head to the side and lays it down next to Bruce's, keeping their bodies close. Inhaling deeply, Dick tips his head so that his nose barely brushes Bruce's shoulder, and lets his arm cross the other man's body to rest low against his hip. ]

I can manage a few hours just fine. This is nice. I don't remember when I last let myself do this...

[Sex is one thing, sleep is another thing completely different. It was probably when he was with Dawn ages ago, letting himself be this vulnerable and open-- he doesn't think he's ever done it completely. It's a new experience, but then again isn't all of this? Closing his eyes, he lets out a long quiet breath and works to rid his mind of thoughts, counting circular breaths a thing he taught himself ages ago so that he could catch at least an hour of sleep in the middle of his roughest cases.]

[batsymbol]

( then that's what they'll do.

both of them.

with dick settled there so close and warm against him, bruce takes it upon himself to gently wind an arm around the other man nestled there with him. the pads of his fingers softly tap, tap, tap against a shoulder — an arm. simply as a means to touch him and lull him into a state of calm and contentment. as much as they're capable of feeling, that is.

a gentle turn of his head, he noses at dick's hair — takes in his scent so fresh and clean from the shower they'd shared, and softly presses his cheek to him. breath quiet. eyes falling shut. the faintest of hums just barely there on his lips. falling asleep like this... he can't say he can get used to it, but. he can enjoy it. at least for now. this moment. with dick. )

[cohero]

[At first the nightmares didn't come. Dick slept for a while, who could really tell for how long it was until after the fact. He'd hoped when they fell asleep together that it might not happen. Dick hadn't slept with anyone since then-- his death, and the pit--, beyond the titans that is. They understood, because they knew. They mostly ignored it, because he always had his own room.

He was back there, the bat in his hand and he was slamming it into Jason over and over, watching his beloved Robin replacement, and the teen he was supposed to mentor turn into so much blood. This time instead of staying his hand like he had in the pit, Dr Crane got to him, and hauled him away -- turning him into one more person living inside their heads.

Dick screamed as his fear began to close in on him. "I must not fear. I will not fear. The wolf will fear me." He cried out his mantra, knowing that eventually he'd wake. Still, pain, excruciating pain, canvased his body while he slept. He was fine in the real world, minus the trembling of his body, his jerking motions and the eventual terror-like cries that began to escape his lips. ]

[batsymbol]

( it seems fitting that one of them has the nightmares tonight.

bruce, for the most part, sleeps without much in the way of dreams. a gentle blessing for the night— morning, in their case. but when dick starts to move — when he starts to jerk and jostle the bed some, blue eyes flutter open and his whole body becomes alert.

it takes him no more than a couple seconds to piece together what's happening and he shifts some — doesn't leave the bed nor dick's side, just gives the other man a bit of space as he looks to him there, bracing himself on his arm. )

Dick.

( it's not a question. it's an attempt to reach out to him verbally first before he gently places a hand to dick's shoulder. a means to rouse him from whatever terrors plague him behind his closed eyes. )

[cohero]

[It does seem like it should be fitting. Dick didn't know that it would be him. He would have rather it not have been him. For once, he would have liked to slept peacefully with someone. Goodness knows that Bruce has done enough to make him feel peace tonight-- at least more than he's felt in a long time. If there's any way to bring in a New Year, it's this.

Tossing and turning, Dick fights the darkness of his dream, and screams through the hold that it has on him inside. It takes the touch to bring him out. It's not until Bruce reaches in and physically pulls him from the pit that Dick realizes that he's not there any more.

Knowing what happened when he wakes, Dick can feel the dampness of his forehead, and sighs against the echo of maniacal laughter. Turning, Dick wraps his arms around Bruce and closes his eyes not saying a word. He knows the other man understands, and that there doesn't need to be words right now. Taking comfort isn't a crime. ]

[batsymbol]

( when bruce wakes from nightmares, it's often by himself. when he was younger, alfred would be there to check on him — to offer an embrace if he needed it and chase away whatever terrors clung to him in the waking world. now, he turns to shots of alcohol in deep amber shades. alone in the kitchen or sometimes in his room. chasing them away with drinks rather than the company of another.

so when dick turns into him — when he wraps those arms around him seeking comfort, he blinks. just for a moment. until a hand comes up and cradles the back of the other man's head. staying like that in the bed. together.

swallowing, he looks past dick — across the room — and when he speaks, his words are soft, meant to try and soothe the best he can. )

I got you.

[cohero]

[Dick is no stranger to a glass filled with dark amber liquid. There are plenty of nights that he's resorted to his private stash, the one locked behind a panel in his bedroom wall. He got into the habit of keeping it there when he was in Titan's Tower and the kids kept nicking his liquor. Dick got smarter, and found a place they would never find it.

Now it's there when he needs it. Always more than one bottle, and always several kinds for the different types of evenings he has. Tonight he doesn't need it. Tonight he doesn't even think about it as he tucks his body tight against another one. It must be an instinct, because Dick doesn't think twice about it.

If it had been any other person, he might not have done it. In fact, Dick knows he wouldn't have his arm wrapped tight and his lips pressed to Bruce's chest, had it been anyone but Bruce-- but here he is. Dick kisses up Bruce's chest and along his chin, finding comfort in the action. He noses softly at the base of Bruce's chin and looks at him with overly large brown eyes.]

I know. Don't let go.